A commentary by a Victoria resident.
The other day I went to visit my mom in long-term care. She was asleep in her chair and difficult to rouse.
That usually means she’s had another mini-stroke, or just that she was so busy over the past couple of days that her little 97-year-old body just couldn’t keep up. She has dementia, so busy can mean participating in real activities or just creating scenarios of days gone by in her own little world.
Her health-care aide came into the room, and we decided it was time to put mom into her bed so she would be more comfortable.
Her aide gently lifted mom and helped her to shuffle over to the bed, not unlike how a parent manoeuvres a tired and cranky toddler into their bed — with soothing words and gentle moves, so she wasn’t startled or more confused. I was so touched by this gentle and loving interaction that I started to cry.
It’s human nature not to think too in-depth about long-term care or think about it in abstract ways or associate it with humour, to make the thought more comfortable.
We’ve probably all heard people laughing and joking with their loved ones when they’re younger and independent, that they’re “not going to be the ones changing their diapers when they’re old!”
But someone does change their diapers, calms their fears, real or imagined, and feeds them when they need it. Someone deals with bewildered tantrums or outbursts of crying for what seems to others like no reason at all.
Someone cares about their health, their teeth, their mental well-being. Someone entertains and recognizes birthdays and holidays, making life seem normal in an atmosphere that can be so far from that state.
And those “someones” deserve our respect and our gratitude. Especially during the holiday season.
To all the health-care aides, nurses, doctors, cleaners, food staff, social co-ordinators, hairdressers, greeters and administration staff. To all the people who contribute to the safety, care and dignity of our elderly citizens — thank you.
Your efforts do not go unseen.
