Dear Lisi: While at dinner the other night, at a nice restaurant where each person’s meal would probably cost roughly $50, I overheard three teenagers speaking with one set of parents. From the way they addressed the adults, it became clear that one child belonged to the parents, while the other two did not.
I was shocked by the way the other two held a conversation. They spoke only in the teenage colloquialisms we hear about on Instagram and TikTok. Everything was “low-key” this and “I back” that.
Do our youth not have a grasp on the English language anymore? Yes, many words have become so commonplace that we don’t consider them rude any longer, but “cap”? These teenagers sounded anything but intellectual.
We left before they did, but I can’t help but wonder if they even thanked their hosts for dinner.
Dumb it down
Not your kids; not your problem. But give them a break. The teenage years are the perfect time to try out new things, like crazy haircuts, different laughs, pronunciations, struts and swagger. I agree that there’s a time and place — and dinner with your friend’s parents isn’t either — but they’re just kids.
Let’s just hope they said thank you.
FEEDBACK Regarding the person trying to help the employer (July 26):
Reader – I don’t understand why you took exception to the writer using the word ‘steal.’ This is what the Oxford dictionary gives as the meaning for ‘steal':
verb 1. 1. take (another person’s property) without permission or legal right and without intending to return it.
Seems to me it fits quite well. While I now ensure I take everything of value out of my car, before taking it in for servicing, it’s a shame one cannot trust people and that the owner took offence at being told what happened. Without accusing any of his employees directly, the owner could have used this as a teaching experience for his staff as to the image this projected to clients.
When my children were growing up, I always left a $20 bill in my car, in case they were using it and it ran out of gas, or they had an emergency, and had no cash or credit card with them. During one of my business trips, one of my children took my car into a dealership for an oil change. When the car was returned, the $20 was missing. I emailed the dealership, and they had a similar reaction to this business owner.
My children always told me when they used the money, and I knew my son had no reason to lie since it was there specifically for their use. The others in our household were on a hockey tournament trip, so there was no way anyone else could have used the money and forgotten to tell me.
Since the dealership basically called me a liar by saying no one in their employ would do this, I never went back to that dealership nor bought any car of that make again. And since we normally bought two new cars when the three-year warranties ran out on the old ones, the dealership with whom I had dealt for years ended up losing out on many sales. More than 25 years have passed, and I still remember how angry I was at what happened.
Lisi – I didn’t take exception; I was explaining why I think the employer responded as he did.
FEEDBACK Regarding the woman ready to retire (July 31):
Reader 1 – I spit my breakfast out in disbelief. Your advice to retire was horrible!! Why the heck should she wait three years to move on with HER life? She’s 75 years old!! She should do it in a timely fashion and not have to coddle anyone!
Reader 2 – As a senior just five years older than your reader, I strongly disagree with your advice to her. She has found a place where she wants to live that may not be available in three years’ time and by then she’ll be 78.
Everyone’s health situation changes as we age, and more problems tend to crop up the older we get. I’m certainly not wishing anything bad for her, but her health could change considerably in those three years that you are suggesting she wait out her leave. I say, she could offer to assist her boss as he trains her replacement, give her tenant as much notice as possible and move on. She has the support of her kids, and she deserves to live the rest of her life as she wishes.
I’m glad I retired when I did.
Lisi – I appreciate this opposing viewpoint.
Lisi Tesher is an advice columnist based in Toronto. Send your relationship questions to [email protected].
